Mystery Box

Our first assignment in Strategic Writing was to create an advertisement based on hints given by our professor: it lives in a box, it's silver, and it's spikey. There were two paths to take: One, use your deductive reasoning skills and solve the puzzle and advertise the product you believe to be the mystery item through writing, or invent an object and produce an equally copy heavy advertisement advertising your product. I, being awful at Crossword puzzles, chose the latter. What I came up with is posted below.